Sometimes , reality is like a dream and a dream is like reality.

-
Lucia was very happy . I could see a big smile on her face and I was happy for her . Finn too was good but he was trying hard not to pretend that he was happy . I was great too until when we went to ride the giant wheel . It was so crowded and tons of noises were coming from everywhere . I got blank again and felt that something sharp just pierced my brain . I was right , it was another episode . But I tried not to pretend because I could not spoil the moment when everyone was happy . After , the ride I said , " It is getting late , I didn't tell Mom that I would be this late so I think we should leave now . You both can enjoy more if you want ". Lucia and Finn both insisted on going back with me . We dropped Lucia and then I greeted Finn and I left for home . It took me around 20 minutes of walk to reach home but those 20 minutes seemed like forever . I could feel my heartbeat because it was so loud that I could hear it clearly and I could hear noises in my surroundings very faintly . I reached home and told mom that I was sleeping early as I was having a headache . I went to my room and laid on my bed.
The next morning , I went to school and to my surprise it was great because we got two free lectures . I went to library to read some comics . My episode was over but I could somehow feel that something was strange . I ignored it ,of course.  I reached the alley to my home . It was quiet and strange . I reached at my home's door and I found it was open . I saw it correct ,it was open but it was never before . Now , I was scared . I entered the house quietly but no one was there not even my family . I called for mom then dad and brother and then granny but no one answered . I was worried , I searched everywhere but could not find them . At last I went to the back door . The moment I entered the door , I froze right where I was trying to believe that it was a dream . My whole family was lying there , covered in blood , laying there lifeless . I ran to them and I hugged them as tight as I could , begging them to wake up . I shouted at them to not play such a terrible prank on me . But they were not waking up not even one of them . I was crying and suddenly I noticed a shadow behind me ...........
I heard my mom's voice right at the moment and I opened my eyes . It was a dream,  a terrible dream . My eyes were red and watery and I was crying . My mom saw me and said to me very calmly ," My dear , did you have a bad dream ". I saw her smiling at me and I was relaxed that she was alive . I jumped off to her and hugged her . I was sobbing and I started , " Mom , are you okay? Are you hurt somewhere ? Is dad okay ? How about granny and brother ? They aren't hurt anywhere , are they?" She knew I was terrified,  she told me to calm down . She said , " Don't worry , everything and everyone is good . See, I am in front of you smiling at you . Do you think any hurt person would smile like that ". She was right but that dream made me terrified and also my BPD episode worse . I went to restroom to wash my face and I saw.................

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The previous me was very happy .

-
 I gave them a smile. She said," I mean, I know but I thought you had feelings for him because you met him way before than I did, I think you two should have a good talk. I am going to call mom and I will tell her that I am staying with you today and you can't object". And before I could say anything she left the living room. And it was us two. It was awkward. I decided to break the silence and spoke first," So, how did that happen. I am rather excited to hear about it". He was staring at the floor," Honestly, I don't know how it started but as we spent some time together. We realized that we had a lot in common , so it just happened like that. Honestly speaking, I also thought that....that you'. And he could not complete his sentence. So I completed it on his behalf," So you thought that I had feelings for you. He gave me a slight nod. I smiled at him and said truthfully," You don't need to feel guilty about anything. I have always th...
Read more

Still trying to digest it

-
 I went back to my seat an asked them how was it and they said I killed it. I hope so too. After the graduation ceremony, we clicked pictures. I was happy to see all of them happy. The feeling was surreal. After that we went home and all of us went out for dinner. Me, Diego, Petra, Paige, Brian and Petra's parents. Brian's parents could not make it to the dinner because her mother was extremely tired from the event and her father didn't want to leave her alone. After spending the one of the best days of my life, we were walking back. I went to Diego and told him slowly, "Can I visit mom and Dad tomorrow?" "Of course you can, but I will..." I cut him off "No. This time I want to be alone and trust me I will be fine" I looked at him with puppy eyes and he had to give up. After that he went to drop Petra and me and Brian were on our way home. "Can you believe we are going to be uni students in a next couple of weeks" I asked him still no...
Read more

Borrowed Life

-
Lucia was watching me nervously because she knew I hated Finn . But what else could we do other than the completing the project together . We had to complete the project after completing our school classes . So we decided to go to library after classes , and we started working on the project and that didn't go too bad.  I went home , sat in front of the mirror . I used to do this quite a lot whenever I felt depressed but today it was quite a different feeling . My days were going very well with good classmates and teachers , my grades were also fine . But , something was missing , somewhere inside my heart I felt that I was lacking something but what that was supposed to be find out . That feeling got worse in quite sometime , istarted to feel suffocated , I felt that there was something heavy on my chest stopping me from breathing . And then I started sobbing and didn't know the reason but I just wanted to cry , so I just let my tears flow. I holded my mouth with my hand so ha...
Read more