Spit Your Anger Out

He said , " when people cry in strong windy area it is quite tough to hear the sound , so you just chose the right spot Ms. Udolph ". I wiped up my face again and glanced at him , his face was calm and he was looking at the view. As I looked him , he looked at me too and politely asked me , ' Are you feeling better Ms. Udolph after crying it all out because sometimes crying help us a lot . Don't worry I won't ask you the reason its your choice to tell but you take me as your friend and you can cry more if you are still not feeling any better . Trust me you will feel better after that and don't worry , I won't tell anyone '. I didn't even realize when I started to cry again and I cried for around 20 minutes . He slowly patted me on my back and asked me ," Ms. Udolph are you feeling any better" . I gave him a slight nod and it was genuinely a better feeling but I was still wondering if I should tell him the reason why I was crying . I decided to tell him afterall he was not a person whose opinion would matter that much to me . I looked straight at the scenery and started , " You know , its sometimes even hard to live an easy life . That's the case with me and after knowing this you might laugh at me or even think I am absurd but since I cried it out so I should shout it out too. 

I am a kind of person who is good at almost everything . I don't want to sound arrogant but this is the thing which is worrying me strangely . Everyone I know and I am sure you too must have your goals for future lives . But me , I don't even know what else to do other then passing my exams and that's just it . This is not what I want , I want an adventurous life , a life having a goal to follow with . You might feel it strange but want to do everything and every profession in my life . I want to know how it feels in every profession and this is impossible , of course it is. I have everyone to worry about me but still you are the first person whom I am telling this so don't tell anyone because they will think I am being driven mad '. 

Now, I looked at him he was staring at me seriously and suddenly he started laughing . Actually I wasn't surprised on this reaction of him I was kind of expecting the reaction after listening to lame mind anyone would have done that but a little bit sooner. He said after laughing giving me a pleasant smile, ' I am really sorry Anna but I didn't do this to hurt you '. I was surprised because it was the first time when he called me by my name. He continued saying , .....................